Confess or Conceal?

“People who conceal their sins will not prosper, but if they confess and turn from them, they will receive mercy.” Proverbs 28:13

I’d like to jot down a few thoughts I have about gaining ground in our journey through life.

Something, for some time has eluded me with regard to understanding. Today in reading the above verse, it seems to perhaps become a little more clear.

This in conjunction with an intense discussion my wife and I had last night over “laziness” I think opened a few doors of understanding in my head.

I have always had a hard time with confession and understanding it in the bible. My thinking has always been that God sees it all. The bible says he sees the future before me, knows the past behind me and even knows the things I will do before I even do them.

As such, WHY do I need to “confess it” to him? It seems a bit redundant.

There are numerous mentions of this confession concept all throughout the bible.

“When I refused to confess my sin, my body wasted away, and I groaned all day long.” Psalm 32:3

“Finally, I confessed all my sins to you and stopped trying to hide my guilt. I said to myself, “I will confess my rebellion to the Lord.” And you forgave me! All my guilt is gone.” Psalm 32:5

“If I had not confessed the sin in my heart, the Lord would not have listened.” Psalm 66:18

In any of the what are called 12 step programs, those programs fashioned after Alcoholics Anonymous, there are a few steps which I think in their inception were/are rooted in this very confession concept.

A number of the steps have a confession tone to them.

Step One

We admitted we were powerless over alcohol — that our lives had become unmanageable.

Step Four

Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves.

Step Five

Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs.

Step Eight

Made a list of all persons we had harmed, and became willing to make amends to them all.

All of us have significant blind spots. We are weak in areas or we act in ways that are harmful or damaging yet we refuse, utterly refuse to see it and acknowledge it. We simply do not want to admit we have a habit or behave a certain way.

Over the past week I have been involved in a couple interactions with others and this very concept has come up silently in my head. Due to the rather sensitive nature of the discussions and the light it may shed on these individuals, I’ll keep their names out of it. But I will make mention that they live in incredible denial, some, almost in delusion of who they are, how they act and the affect this has on those around them.

I’m quite sure you know people in your own lives who are that way. It frustrates you beyond your ability to express.

Like the drunk who refuses to acknowledge their addiction and harm it is causing, so too those around us in our lives frustrate us.

Yet, we all do it.

I do, you do, we all do.

We all have blinders on. We all, I believe, tend to live in some state of denial of who we are and what we do. We frequently REFUSE to call a spade a spade.

Side note - Generally speaking, those things which create rage and fury in us that others are doing, generally are the VERY THINGS we are most guilty of. Hence, blind.

We are blind to the very things we do which hurt those around us or hurt ourselves in our life.

I bring up again Psalm 32:3 When we refuse to look at and acknowledge our sin, we suffer physically and emotionally.

I believe, in this morning’s bible study and through some Holy Spirit intervention, I think I have perhaps found the reason God is so bent on confession of “sins”.

When we refuse to confess, we live in a lie. This demonstrates an independent spirit, one which wants to rule the life independent of God.

This independent spirit is inherent in the human condition. This independent way of living alienates us first and foremost from God, our Father and Creator. It also eventually will alienate us from those around us.

Why?

We refuse to see and acknowledge something we may be doing that is sinful or harmful to those around us.

We want to live a perfect life and we want to fully control our destiny and our lives.

Admitting we have a certain dependence may mean, in our heads, we are weak.

It may mean we are lazy as well.

You see, in my view, confessing something may come to mean in our minds we have to do very hard work to fix the problem.

This may or may not be the case. I would submit, however that more likely than not it is.

I am coming more and more to see that God wants to heal and help us from these traits.

He’s a miracle working God.

Over the past year or so I am embracing more and more the confession and turning it all over to him concepts which run all through scripture.

For example. Whenever I get angry or am tired AND angry, it becomes easy for me to use “foul and coarse” language. I don’t like it that I do. It demonstrates a weak command of the language. And frankly, I like how much force and emphasis the foul “swear” words tend to cause me to feel.

Yet, I hate it that I do this.

Whenever I try and fix this on my own, without confessing and acknowledging it in my mind to God, I tend to find it difficult to stop.

However, if I turn it over to him, confess my sin, my inability to fix it, he always steps in and seemingly, magically, takes it away.

Yes, it will come back at times, but when it does, I again confess it to him, and he seems to take it away for a lengthy period.

I believe a significant reason folks suffer with the issues they do is that they are trying to fix it with a magic pill or some kind of easy fix hoping the next diet, the next pill, the next group therapy (counseling IS good for a period), will fix their issue.

Yet, they never go before God and really confess the issue in true humility with a strong desire to fix it.

Some of the struggles I see regularly that are ruining lives:

Alcohol Addiction

Drug Addiction

Pornography Addiction

Sexual Addiction

Gluttony and Obesity (Christians in particular seem to LOVE their food…the acceptable vice)

Laziness and Sloth

Self Righteousness

Adultery and Extra Marital Affairs

Gossip

Lewdness

Greed

And yet, God wants us to be free of all these and more.

If, however, we never admit to him we need the help, it means to him we don’t really want the help.

And I think it’s that very statement which has become as clear as day to me this morning.

The confessing puts us in a place that we sincerely want to fix the problem. We are tired of dealing with it and sick of the outcome it brings into our daily lives. We have tried and tried on our own and we never really get past it.

Yes, there are some things, as Paul describes, that will be a thorn to us for our lifetime. I think God allows such things to keep us dependent on him for grace and mercy for life.

But most things he wants to help us get past.

Consider this.

How many of us, were one of our children, or our spouse, to come to us and confess they are really having a difficult struggle with some area in life, would turn them away and tell them to “deal with it” and not want to be bothered with it?

Yes, there are some selfish parents who would rather not have to deal with it.

But I can say that if my wife or children came to me in sincerity of heart to discuss with me something they seem to be stuck in, no matter what that might be, and ask me to help either through advice or even just holding them accountable, I am more than willing to help.

And if me, rob, as a mere mortal and human, stuck in the condition I am wants to help, has an urge or desire to help, won’t the Almighty God, through Jesus Christ and the Holy Spirit be willing to help if we/I only ASK for the help?

I think that’s the true spirit of confession and admitting we have a problem.

Doing so requires significant humility. I think that humility is the very thing needed in order to find not only healing but to advance us to the next level in our lives.

A few of the writers in the bible seem to agree

So humble yourselves before God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you. James 4:7

Humble yourselves before the Lord, and he will lift you up in honor. 4:10

So humble yourselves under the mighty power of God, and at the right time he will lift you up in honor. 1 Peter 5:6

Confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. James 5:16

The road to living better, more peacefully requires us to drop the “I got this” attitude and begin to embrace the “Ya know, I could use a hand here, would you mind lending one?”

I hope you are well,

rob