Alignment of Priorities

What A Trip to the Florida Panhandle (The Emerald Coast) Taught Me

Navarre Beach at Sunset From 400 Feet in the Air

Dad and Levi on top of Bunson Peak, Yellowstone

Life has been good to me. I am healthy and I have 4 children all of whom are significant contributors to the society in which we live. Taxpaying, hard working, ass kicking kids. My oldest being 29. The youngest recently turning 18.

The year was 1995. I was dragged reluctantly to the Pontiac Silverdome in Detroit Michigan that May.

At the time, I was a “Christian” really in name only. Not much of my life would indicate outwardly I followed Jesus or his instruction. Honestly, because I didn’t. I said I did. But I didn’t. Doing and saying are two different things. Words vs Actions son.

Playing Around after Sunrise in Zion with Joelle

I grew up in a family of florists. Like many who grow up in a small business family, it seemed with relative frequency the business and it’s challenges would conflict with things in life that were really important. In America, the small business and it’s challenges of long hours for often little pay, seem to be placed in the most important seat of our lives. Much of the time, this was my family experience.

It was here where God, in his infinite wisdom and mercy decided I would be the one who would alter these particular sets of priorities. At least in my own little world. It would in fact start with the 2 young children with which at the time I was blessed.

My daughter was only 2. Her brother a mere 6 months. Not even yet on the radar was their younger brother, nor was the young man would would ultimately show up as a step son some 16 years later.

Sprague Lake for Sunrise with Jacob

It was at this conference my world was turned upside down. What I viewed to be important for the duration of my life took a back seat and what was often an inconvenience or a “necessary evil” in life actually jumped into the dominant placeholder of my priority alignment personal organizer of the mind.

This is not to say work and the production of income is unimportant. It is for the survival of family. You know, food, shelter…all that jazz. However, every turn of every day from that moment in time forward became a test. An exercise of choices made putting to the proverbial grindstone of sharpening those things which would remain of utmost highest.

We made church and a commitment to a small body of fellow believers priority. We chose then, when the time would come, to home school our children all the way through.

Hermitage Point with Elise…and Mosquitos

I tried college because it’s what your “supposed to do”. I felt like a failure for not going as all my friends had. It took only a single semester to realize something would be sacrificed to the priority organizer in my mind, shredded off as it came close to the aforementioned grindstone constantly spinning in my head.

As I often tell people, you can generally have 2 things in life, but never 3.

It was either going to be Work and Family or School and Family or Work and School. I could not, however, have Work, School, AND Family simultaneously. Not to any significant success with any of the 3 at least.

It was, after my experience in Detroit, an easy choice to make.

I have never regretted my choice to invest my life into the lives of my family and my children. To quote the greatest man I have known over the course of my life from a letter sent to me shortly before his death “ I pray that the best disciples you find will be your children…”. I heeded his advice to the best of my abilities. I have been made fun of and criticized regularly for my beliefs related to such matters. In particular those choices related to parenting and home schooling. I have lived my life in a state as a parent most can’t understand. Most people send their kids to government funded daycare 9 months out of the year called the public school. They put them in camps all summer. Sports teams, you name it. Pastors stand up in front of their congregations with great fanfare announcing the return to school in the coming weeks as the congregations clap their hands in applause. In other words, kids are an inconvenience it would appear, like a puppy, losing their appeal after about a year of ownership. Always looking for ways to have someone else relieve the burden of said puppy/child.

Observing the 30 and under crowd today and how they compare to the children who grew up in my household, well, it reinforces I was right. I made the correct choice.

And we wonder what is going on right now in our country. How it can be we seem so lost…but I digress.

This preface lays the foundation for what I now wish to espouse.

It relates to my trip to the Panhandle.

Are you familiar with John A Chapman? Mr. Chapman was made famous posthumously be receiving the United States Medal of Honor for his bravery behind enemy lines.

Watch the Video of John Chapman Here

What makes this award so special is that it is the first ever Medal of Honor incident fully recorded. I’m providing the Youtube video of this man’s heroism as recorded by a CIA predator drone. If this video doesn’t make you proud to be an American, nothing will.

This man and what he did is amazing and highly relevant to my story. More on this shortly.

Two of my sons serve this country. My middle boy is a United States Marine. My youngest son serves in the United States Special Forces. The trip to the Panhandle was so that my wife, his step brother, and I could be there as he had finally completed his full training and would be “graduating”. It would be a small ceremony of about 13 men whittled down over the years from over 100, all of whom completed the 3 years of grinding, brutal training required of these elite operators. There would be family members as well as commanding officers and coaches responsible for their training.

In order to be present at this ceremony, I had a choice to make, As you know, I own a flower shop currently. We run it tightly and have no employees, instead choosing to run it ourselves. “All in the Family”.

Dantes View with Levi and Ed. Death Valley.

This meant either I would choose to stay in Central Florida to keep the shop open OR I would choose to close the shop for 3 days when we would normally be open and take the long journey to the Pensacola area.

I chose the latter.

While there, we toured the facility, shared an Air BNB home with my son and his wife, enjoyed some drone flying time doing photography and video and in general fully immersed ourselves in the experience of family.

The big day came and we were shown around the base where they train. Fed a very nice lunch and then ushered into the facility to enjoy the formal ceremony.

It was awesome watching the men receive their graduation papers, each walking proudly across the stage to shake hands and pose for the photo.

After each one did so, the leading commander then talked about an award.

It is called the John A Chapman award. Given in honor of a man who sacrificed his life so others could live. The award is significant…to say the least.

As they talked about the award, in my mind, what made it so much more special is this particular accolade was most heavily weighted on the votes of the peer group. The other members of the Special Forces Team with which the bonds of brotherhood have been built over the years. Yes, the commanding officers have a say. However, the largest determining factor are the votes of the fellow servicemen in the group.

Can you then imagine the pride I felt when they announced the award would be given to my son?

A host of emotions ran through my head. In particular fueled by knowing what this kid had gone through over 3 years to get to this place.

At the top of this list of emotions was the joy felt that in 1995, God in heaven thought well enough of me to alter my life to such a degree that never would come a day business or the pursuit of money would keep me from something as grand as this moment in time.

Here is an important point to not miss.

My son had no idea he would be receiving this award. I had no idea, his wife had no idea. It was entirely secret.

Had he received the award and I instead had chosen to stay home because it would be just a little too inconvenient or the flower shop took that higher place, I am not sure I could ever forgive myself.

But that’s me.

How much of what really matters in life are we missing, are you missing, because you have your priorities a little (or even a LOT) upside down?

I can tell you one thing. There isn’t a dollar amount in the world you could give me or promise me that would be enough to replace what I was able to see and be a part of that day.

To make it even more special, Mr. Chapmans wife is who presented this award to my son and gave him a big hug.

What Really Matters…

And to have him stand up there to give an impromptu speech talking, of all things, about how had it not been for a father like me, a family such as he grew up within, he likely wouldn’t be where he is at that moment…well…hard not to tear up. Let’s just say that.

So…What did this trip teach me?

God knows best. He always has and always will. Trust him, even when it’s a lonely, desolate road upon which I travel.

Sacrifice is required.

Children are a gift worth more than anything else in life other than one’s spouse.

Nothing matters more than sharing life with those you love. Living it radically with them. Embracing it fully with them. Sharing key moments with them. Loving with them, laughing with them, traveling with them, crying with them, encouraging them, supporting them, blessing them, protecting them. Teaching them to never lie, live with integrity, make the right choices, always evaluate priorities.

To do this requires a constant evaluation of my priorities and WILL mean making tough choices frequently to maintain this highest standard.

As I close out this particular writing, I hope perhaps you may be inspired to evaluate the matters of priority in your own minds eye. Maybe you are able to find an area or two which can be adjusted or sharpened some.

We live in an upside down world right now. Correcting this starts within our own hearts, one at a time, we must choose to make better choices and decisions should we hope to get back on the right track.

We must be willing to no longer lie to ourselves. We must face the truth head on and call it for what it is. We fool no one. May you find freedom in radical honesty as you asses your current place in life. The Tyranny of Self Delusion is rampant across our culture today. It does nothing but destroy.

Until Next Time.

Love all of you,

rob out

The Pensacola shoreline just before sun up…with Ed helping me as my drone observer